The Ultimate Showdown Too
by inverse03
Summary: This is a story about a big fight with some famous characters. For those who liked the Flash movie The Ultimte Showdown, you'll like this one.
1. Chapter 1

For those of you who are skeptical, let me tell you this: this is a real story. "Why it happened?" you might ask…who knows. I don't even really know why it happened, but let me tell you how it happened. It was a great battle, one of the greatest battles to go down in the world history books. You could say that it was an Ultimate Showdown.

Anyway, it all started when King Kong was passing nearby City 18 when a man named Gordon Freeman came by. He looked up at King Kong and almost said something, but everyone knows that Gordon Freeman doesn't talk. Still, he got out his crowbar and, for no apparent reason, started whacking King Kong with it. This made King Kong really pissed off and he started to stomp the ground.

Gordon ran but was stopped by Majin Buu. Freeman bounced off Buu's belly and fell to the feet of King Kong.

"Why mean man run into Buu?" Buu asked, "Buu make you pay!"

Buu was about to pull off a Kamehameha blast when Sammus Aran blasted him with her power beam. King Kong swung at her but he missed and got hit by Freeman's Gauss cannon. Buu went after Sammus and attacked her with a Special Force Beam. She dodged and hit Buu with her charged power beam. King Kong knocked her over and Freeman hit Buu with his Gluon gun.

This fighting started to bring a crowd of people around to see what was going on. All four of the fighters had fans: some for King Kong, some for Freeman, some for Sammus, and some for Buu. From behind the crowd a white convertible with bull horns on the front flew overhead and landed right in front of them. From the car came Boss Hogg and a couple of police cars followed behind him.

"Arrest them!" he shouted, "Arrest them…guys…in the…funny…lookin'…suits. Just arrest them!"

From behind him, there was a noise that Boss Hogg dreaded to hear and when he turned around, much to his dismay, the General Lee was blaring its horn and who was driving it? Not Bo, not Luke, but the General Robert E. Lee himself. He took a crossbow and shot Boss Hogg right through the neck.

"That'll teach ya to try and mess with them Duke Boys," he said as he drove on.

Lord Sauron suddenly appeared and observed the commotion: man vs. beast vs. some…type of alien. "Finally," he said, "now that the worlds greatest warriors are at battle, I shall claim my ring. The one ring…TO RULE THEM ALL!"

As he finished his soliloquy, O.J. Simpson came behind him and cut Sauron's right ring finger off. "Noooooooo!" Sauron exclaimed, "How did he know that my one weakness was my right left finger?"

O.J. ran off to his white SUV, got in, and drove off. He found out later that he was being followed by Barney Calhoun in his scout car.

"Give it up, O.J.," Calhoun said over the megaphone, "You may have gotten off the last time but we've got you now."

Just then a Strider impaled O.J.'s car with its foot; O.J. fell out and ran away before Calhoun could catch him. Back to the original fight, Freeman, Sammus, King Kong, and Buu were still fighting when Predator came in and started fighting them. He took Sammus and Freeman out in one blow and he knocked King Kong down but he still had to deal with Buu.

George Clooney came in and said, "Hey, this isn't the world premier of my new movie Syriana; there's more people here."

Clooney got knocked down by Luigi high-flying kick. That's right: Luigi was there and not Mario, what now? Adrian Monk came in and as soon as he saw the bodies (several innocent civilians, Boss Hogg included, were killed in the fight) he started getting panicky. He put two black gloves on and started rearranging the bodies into no particular order.

O.J. came back and said to Monk, "Hey, those are my gloves…I mean…I was borrowing those gloves from a friend. They're not mine; I've never seen those gloves in my life."

Russell Crowe came behind and snapped his neck. "Ohlroight, 'ho's next?" he shouted. Predator noticed him and charged at him. "Bring it on, Predator!" he exclaimed, "Oim no' afraid ta foight you." For the record everyone knows that Russell Crowe is making movies, making songs, and foightin' round the world.


	2. Chapter 2

At this time, John Madden came in to the fight but before he did he did a little play-by-play. He stated why this whole fight didn't make any real sense and used his play-by play screen to recap what had happened He got to the end of his spiel when Predator smashed his screen.

"Oh, so…so…so that's how it gonna be huh?" John Madden said. "Well bring it on, bitch."

"Oh no you don't!" Russell Crowe exclaimed, "He's mine and Oim gonna foight 'im."

"Bring it on you womanly baby!"

"No one _ever_ colls Russell Crowe a womanly baby, 'ho the 'ell d'ya think you a'?"

"It's on now!"

Russell Crowe and John Madden got into an all out brawl while Predator stood by and let the fight continue. "_I never knew that I was so popular_," Predator thought. "_Even after that flop Alien vs. Predator. I mean sure I was in it but come on! They could've used _some _lighting_."

During Crowe and Madden's brawl, John grabbed Crowe's leg, Crowe grabbed John's esophagus, John bit Crowe's ear, Crowe chewed off John's eyebrows, John took out his appendix, and Crowe gave John a colonic irrigation; believe it.

After a few minutes of fighting, Predator picked the both of them up by their tattered and torn shirts and said, "Do you guys know why we are fighting in the first place?"

"No," they said together.

"No, I mean, _why _are we fighting?" Predator asked again. "Is there a real reason why we're fighting?"

"I don't really think so," John Madden said.

"The only reason Oi foight is because Oi 'ave sum anger issues," Russell Crowe said.

"Aw, forget it," Predator said, "I think I'll just go back to kicking your guys' asses." Predator threw them on the ground and started wailing on them.

Tupac Shakur came by in his super flying car and landed right by Predator, Madden, and Crowe. " 'sup N-words!" he said.

"Hey Tupac," Predator said.

"Hey, I thought you were dead," John Madden said.

"You thought wrong, bitch."

"Woi do you 'ave a floying ca'?" Crowe asked.

"Because of all the money I've made after my 'death'."

"Why did you say 'N-word'?" Madden asked.

"Because, man, I still have to watch what I say; I don't want the FCC to be all up in my ass and finding out I'm not dead. Do you know what that'll do to my record sales"

"Works for me," Predator said.

"Anyways," Tupac said, "I came to bust a cap in yo' asses." He pulled out his gat and shot Crowe and Madden in the ass. "Oh, Predator, you's comin' to that party later, right?"

"Hells yeah," Predator said, "As soon as I'm finished with these assholes."

"Aight, then," Tupac said and flew off in his car.

Meanwhile, Tony Montana came up behind Predator and said, "So you fraternizing with the enemy, huh?"

"Oh, shit, it's Tony Montana," Predator exclaimed.

"So, you gonna screw me over, huh?" Tony said as he pulled out his AK-47 from under his coat.

"Hey, let's talk things over now."

"You mess with me, you mess with the best; say hello to my little friend." Tony opened fire on the three of them he shot up Russell Crowe and John Madden but he didn't hit Predator.

"Well, it…it…it appears that I am bleeding to death," John Madden said, "so I guess that is what that's all about."

But all was not lost for Mark Hamil came in with his light saber and cut off Tony Montana's right arm.

"I'll still be alright," Tony said reassuringly. Hamil cut Tony's other arm off. "I can still use a gun," he said as he picked up his 47 with his teeth.

Little did Hamil know, Tom Hanks was sneaking up behind him, ready to shank him with a machete. Tom Hanks jumped in for the kill; he had Mark Hamil in his sights—_smack_. A bag of popcorn hit him in the face; some hecklers threw it at him.

"You suck, Tom Hanks," one of the hecklers said.

"Yeah, your movie, the Terminal, was as funny as an ulcer," the other said, starting to laugh.

But where Tom Hanks failed, others succeeded. That's right: Jimmy Dean, James Dean, James Monroe, Marilyn Monroe, Marilyn Manson, Shirley Manson, Charles Manson, the Manson Family, the Adams Family, John Adams, John Kerry, Carrie White, Andrew White, Andrew Jackson, Michael Jackson, Michael Moore, George Moore, George Burns, Mr. Burns, Burnie Burns, and Bernie Mac all came out of nowhere and brought Mark Hamil down.

Meanwhile, King Kong was still fighting Freeman and Sammus when Rei Ayanami tackled King Kong in her Eva and a Covenant Elite attacked Gordon and Sammus. The Strider that took out O.J.'s car came by and started firing on King Kong and Rei. Rei took out the Strider but she was greeted by the Witch King. He hurled his mace into King Kong's face and his blood sprayed everywhere.

Count Olaf was passing through saying, "At last, I finally got those blasted Baudelaire orphan's money. Now, what do I want to spend it on?"

"Yoink," Mr. Burns said as he took the money from Olaf's hands. "I'll be taking the money now," he said as he ran off.

"Over my dead body," Olaf swore as he ran after Burns.

The chase didn't last very long, as the both of them grew tired of running and needed a rest. Everyone who was involved in the fight (except for Boss Hogg, O.J. Simpson, George Clooney, Russell Crowe, and John Madden) was still fighting when the Mad Hatter shouted, "TRADE PLACES!"

Everyone immediately stopped fighting who they were fighting and started fighting someone else. It was utter chaos; the body count was rising, until the Mad Hatter shouted, "TRADE PLACES!" and everyone started fighting someone else.


	3. Chapter 3

Now Ashlee Simpson came up and got on her own stage. "Hey everyone," she said, "I'm gonna sing a new song that I wrote about what's going on here."

Everyone screamed, "NOOOOOOOOOOOO!" but she went on with it.

When she started singing, everyone that was in the fight started to cover their ears and flail on the ground. The only ones who weren't doing this were four or five of her fans that came to see her perform. Even the two hecklers that heckled Tom Hanks were covering their ears.

One of the hecklers said, "Man, this song makes me wanna la-la-lop my head off," and both the hecklers laughed.

Ironically, the Headless Horseman came in and did what no one else could do: he cut her head off. "That'll teach you not to blame others for your own mistakes," he said while carrying her head and throwing it into the crowd.

The other fighters cheered for him when he did this…and continued on fighting each other. The Witch King came down and started to attack the onlookers but he didn't expect to be stopped by Col. Roy Mustang. He used his fire alchemy to put the Witch King in his place, even if he did get hit in the face by the Witch Kings giant mace. Later, Hillary Duff came on stage to sing one of her own songs, but she got pushed off stage by Madonna.

"Step aside little girl," she said. "Let an experienced singer sing; so let's Vogue and listen to me sing my newest single."

Her music started up but Zabuza came in, took out his long sword and cut (no pun intended) her short by slicing her through her abdomen.

"How could you do this to me?" Madonna asked as her blood started flowing out of her, "I'm British!"

"Real British people don't pump their gas in the nude," Zabuza said.

J.K. Rowling came in and cast a spell on Madonna to make her whole again.

"Thank you," Madonna said, "we British people have to stick together."

"I didn't do it because of that," Rowling said, "I just wanted to see him cut you in half again, besides you're not really British anyways."

Zabuza cut Madonna in half again as both he and Rowling laughed at Madonna's pain. A girl about ten years old came up to Rowling and said, "You're J.K. Rowling aren't you?"

"Why yes I am, young Muggle," she said.

"Could you tell me how the Harry Potter series ends?" the girl asked.

"He grows up to be a powerful wizard and marries you, is that what you wanted to hear?"

The little girl swooned and said, "Yes."

"Pathetic," Rowling said.

"Tell me about it," Lord Voldemort said as he walked by.

Mike Tyson ran up and knocked Zabuza over. "So, you think you're better than me, cuttin' people in half like that?" Mike asked.

"Actually I am, head case," Zabuza said.

"Hey, only my mama calls me a head case, demon boy!"

"And only my mama calls me demon boy!"

They both started boxing each other and Mike bit off Zabuza's right ear. "Ha ha, take that ya little bi…" Mike said before Zabuza threw him across the street and into the local Tipton Hotel.

Mr. Moseby was walking by when Mike came flying in. "Listen, you: this is not one of you fighting arenas," Moseby said.

Mike ran out of there to take on Zabuza again but was thrown back in to the Tipton, nearly hitting Mr. Moseby. "Maybe…I'll just stay out of the way," Mr. Moseby said.

Mike ran out again only to be thrown back in the Tipton and knocking down a vase in the process. Mr. Moseby gasped and said, "That was an antique; that's it, no more Mr. Nice Guy."

Moseby approached Mike and said, "Listen you…boxing…person: you better have the money to pay for that vase or there will be severe consequences."

"Oh yeah, what are ya gonna do: sissy-slap me?" Mike asked and started to laugh.

Moseby punched Mike in the face and Mike nearly fell over. "You caught me off guard that time," he said, "but next time I'll…"

Moseby hit him in the face again.

"Okay, now I'm really mad; this time you're gonna…"

Moseby hit him in the face for the third time, knocking some of his teeth out in the process.

"Ooh, you knocked out my teeph," Mike said, writhing in pain, "How am I supposed to box if I can't bite people?"

Moseby grabbed Mike, grabbed him by his neck and shorts, and threw him out of the Tipton. "And don't let me catch you around here again, you hooligan!"


	4. Chapter 4

Just as things seemed like they couldn't get any worse, the Munchkins come walking in singing their little ditty when they stop.

"Hey, this isn't Oz," one of the Munchkins' said.

"Yeah, and this isn't the yellow brick road either," another one stated. "It's not even yellow."

"This 'Tourists Guide to Oz' lied to us," a third one said.

They were interrupted by Randy Newman driving a steamroller, playing his song "Short People". The Munchkins started running but they weren't fast enough to prevent themselves from being flattened.

Randy Newman laughed and said, "I mean what I said in this song, those little bastards."

James Bond's car flew directly overhead the steamroller and just barely missed a Munchkin. However, it wasn't James Bond who was driving; it was former Country music singer Kenny Rogers behind the wheel of James Bond's car.

"Whohoo, this sure is swell," Kenny said.

"Yes, but try not to hit anyone while you're at it," Bond said.

"Hey I only hit someone once okay; and the last time I checked, I was driving, not Mr. Fancy-Pants over, got it?"

"Could I say something?"

"And another thing: I'm Kenny Rogers! I don't like it when people interrupt me."

"Yes but you're…"

"I am not finished; now as I was saying…"

The car smacked into something and Kenny swerved, nearly crashing into the side wall.

"What the hell was that?" Kenny exclaimed.

"I think you just hit Hillary Duff," Bond commented.

"Well, why didn't you say something?"

"I tried to tell you, but…"

"Ahhh, who cares about Hilary Duff anyway?" Kenny added.

Behind the car, John McEnroe took out his tennis racket and tennis ball bombs and aimed it at Bond's car. He swung and it looked like the ball was going on target, but it missed by a centimeter and hit a tree, causing it to blow up.

"YOU CANNOT BE SERIOUS!" John shouted as he threw his tennis racket at the ground.

"What the hell was that?" Kenny asked.

"I think it was some washed-up, has-been tennis player trying to get back into the public eye," Bond commented.

"Well if he wants to get back into the public eye, he should have his own Reality TV show like I did," Kenny exclaimed.

"Yes, we all know how well that worked out.

Meanwhile, Dr. Phil was consulting Madonna's severed torso.

"I don't know where I went wrong, Dr. Phil," Madonna said. "I try to be the best British person I can be but what do I get? I get cut in half by some rogue ninja."

"Well, what I can say is that you're retarded," Dr. Phil commented. "I mean, first you say you're Jewish, then you say you're British, I mean: make up your mind, woman. You need to stop living in the past and start being your own person.

"Also: stop steeling Abba's music rifts; if I catch you doing it again, there will be Hell to pay, both literally and figuratively. You don't believe me, ask Oprah."

The Kool-Aid man burst in through the wall and screamed, "OH YEAH!"

"And we need to talk about your over-activeness, young man," Dr. Phil said.

Four sliver bullets flew right threw the Kool-Aid man and he said, "OH NO!"

Magneto came up behind and said, "I'm sorry, but it had to be done. That Kool-Aid bastard needed to be silenced."

"Mr., that is _not_ how we empower others emotional well being," Dr. Phil stated.

"And what are you going to do about it; sick Oprah on me? Everyone knows that _I _control Oprah."

"Yes Magneto, absolutely."

Kenny Rogers came over and said, "Hey look; free Kool-Aid!" Kenny started to get his flask out and get as much Kool-Aid in it as possible.

Over near the Bond car, Adam West was standing on top of a building with men in white suits trying to coax him down.

"C'mon Mr. West," one of them said, "you've gotta come down sometime."

"Never!" Adam shouted and he jumped off and landed into James Bond's car. "Hey, nice car," he said to James Bond, "Can I drive?"

"Sure, why not," Bond said, "It's better than letting Kenny Rogers drive."

"Then let's go," Adam said as he started the ignition and sped off out of town.

They were only gone for a few seconds when Rei Ayanami's Eva crashed onto Bond's car, causing the Eva's entry plug to eject and ejecting Rei out in the process. She landed onto the side walk where the Kool-Aid man was taken out.

"So…much…pain," she said.

"Tell me about it," the Kool-Aid guy responded.

Meanwhile, at Bond's wrecked car, the air bags had deployed, preventing any damage from happening to James Bond and Adam West.

"Thank God we were wearing our seatbelts," Bond said.

"And the air bags," West said, "don't forget about those."

The battle went on for awhile, at least for five days before the fighting stopped. Yes, this was the ultimate showdown; there were good guys, there were bad guys, and there were explosions that could be seen for miles. Many lives were claimed during this fight, but eventually there stood a champion.

Yes from a pile of bodies arose Red Forman, covered in blood. He was holding his fist up high with one hand and holding the head of Freddy Krueger in the other.

He lifted the head to eye level and said, "This will teach you to be a dumbass."

He threw the head down on the ground and solemnly walked away. As he walked down that road, Freddy's severed head smiled and winked.


End file.
